“You Know, I Don’t Usually Dress Like This”

I’m still working on getting friends and acquaintances to submit their real-life stories for this site. It’s difficult to talk people into sending me e-mails in their spare time (because it involves writing sentences and words — believe me, I understand), but I’ve collected a lot of verbal anecdotes. I thought I’d share some of them with you.

— “Louis,” a gay man, went to a Halloween party dressed as a fratboy, wearing track pants and a tight tank top that said “I love pussy” or some such thing. After the party, he went to a bar with friends and picked up a guy there. Back at home, he was kind of embarrassed and explained “you know, I don’t usually dress like this.” The dude was like “WHY NOT??”

— “Harold” met his fiancee on a popular social networking site after she sent him a message about a book he had mentioned on his profile. They e-mailed about books, then moved on to meeting in real life. The first time he saw her, he recalled thinking she was much too beautiful for him. After they ate dinner and watched a movie in his apartment, she coyly insisted on sleeping in his bed (although actually, they just cuddled that first night). He was wearing a Tom Waits t-shirt and some sort of hoodie.

— A good friend of mine, “Marilyn,” started fooling around with a colleague she’s known for a year, and who recently split up with his girlfriend. They hooked up at a party, and then the hooked up again the following night. Everyone who heard about it was surprised, because he’s really outdoorsy, and she’s like a less athletic and even girlier version of me. If they start dating, she might have to go on a hike. Marilyn reports that the outfit she was wearing wasn’t very impressive, consisting of “some kind of muu-muu.”

— “Dov,” a young married man from Jerusalem, points out (correctly) that none of his examples count because “everything I wear gets me laid.”

Basically, except for Dov and Harold, most people are assigning credit to “alcohol and desperation” (actual quote from another friend). This trend seems likely to continue as the economy worsens. I’d like to emphasize that by the standards of this site, anything counts which didn’t actively PREVENT you from getting laid. “My two cents” is that even if unattractive or poorly-conceived outfits can be successful out in the field, I still think it’s worthwhile to make some sort of effort. So do YOU have a story to share?

Tom Waits t-shirt (red)

Tom Waits t-shirt (red)

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2 Responses to ““You Know, I Don’t Usually Dress Like This””

  1. "Marilyn" Says:

    While alcohol was involved, I don’t know if I would say that desperation was, oddly enough. Don’t let the muumuu fool you, it was rather fetching and it showed my dĂ©colletage.

  2. […] Swam In My Underwear That Night” In a previous post, I mentioned “Marilyn,” a young woman who described her winning outfit as “some […]

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